Anger Management

Last week, a Cornell student severely beat and tortured a dog he was "taking care of" for a neighbor. The dog chewed through a speaker wire and Mr. Ivy League went totally apeshit over it. He spouted off to the police that he had no remorse, would do it again and knew he would get off with a slap on the wrist.

Reading this news in our small-town newspaper ripped my heart out and truly upset me, as well as a good deal of the rest of the community. I was told by some heartless ignoramus that I was "too angry" about it, that we should feel sorry for the little bastard because of course we as a society have failed him. Whatever. Anyway, in light of my newfound calmness (I say this dripping with sarcasm of course), a haiku:

Weak little bitch-ass
Big man feels good beating dog
Now jump off a bridge